did i mention the whipped cream holster?

Good evening and a wicker duck that im assuming is supposed to be here for aesthetic purposes...?

this is my last night in my very own hotel room, and there are only 3 word for that:

so.

many.

hookers.

really tho, today i went to a baseball game and it was really fucking cold and i wanted something warm and delicious but your mom wasnt around. and then i saw the hot chocolate vendor walking up and down the aisles. the man wears A TANK OF HOT CHOCOLATE on his back, with a little hose to dispense it and a whipped cream holster. allow me to repeat that: whipped cream holster. he has a holster for easy access to his two cans of whipped cream. tank strapped on tight, hose at the ready, aerosol dispensers blazing, this guy is armed and dangerous, walking up the aisle towards me like some beautiful delicious ghostbuster. fuck the game, i will pay you SO MUCH MONEY to come to my room later wearing only that equipment. im not sure you heard me: THE MAN WEARS A TANK OF HOT CHOCOLATE.

in other news, i went to the zoo today. i'd love to tell you all about it but im waiting to illustrate with the 10 or so pictures i took before my camera fucking died. ive been saving the battery all week to take pictures of animals at the zoooooooo because they are so much more fun than people, and half an hour before the lion feeding the camera f-ing dies. but man, if that camera had worked you guys would see so much gigantic rhinocerous wang you wouldnt even know what to do with yourself. everywhere i went there was a different species of rhino showing off his junk. and all i can say is, it must be good to be a lady rhinocerous.

altho its probaby pretty hard to get a whipped cream holster that size...